Divorce attorney

7 Tips on Choosing a Divorce Attorney

Hiring a good divorce attorney to represent you matters. The choice can make the difference between (a) getting what you deserve or (b) walking out of court empty handed.

Emotions run high at this point in the process. But try to keep in mind that this is a process nonetheless. It’s a means to an end. While it’s difficult to separate yourself from such an emotionally charged occurrence, hiring the right attorney can help you do that.

Special considerations will have to be made if you signed a prenuptial agreement ahead of the marriage. You’ll also have to consider other factors like retirement accounts, savings, and who’ll retain ownership of your house.

Note: This article is for educational purposes only.

1. Have Realistic Expectations

Highly optimistic man

The function of divorce is to dissolve your marriage, separate your property, and figure out child custody and support. Your attorney is a part of the negotiation process and acts as your representative in court. They aren’t there to be your friend or to hold your hand through it.

An experienced lawyer has seen and heard it all. You’re not going to say something that will completely change the disposition of the case. That only happens on TV. Nevertheless, keep your attorney-client relationship professional. You might want to spend hours venting your problems and frustrations, but that’s not what your attorney is for!

2. Focus On The End Result

In the process of choosing the right divorce attorney, you’ll find yourself sidetracked and overwhelmed by everything you’ll have to consider. You’ve built up quite a life for yourself and your partner. And even if you don’t want it to end, you know somewhere deep inside your gut that it’s the right thing to do.

As you interview attorneys to potentially represent you, be up front about your issues and lay them all out on the table.

The goal, the reason you’re going through all of this, is to end your marriage. That’s where your focus should be. Anytime you find yourself distracted by upcoming court dates or a confrontation with your ex, remind yourself that the conflict will soon be over.

3. Know What You Want

Before ever scouting out divorce attorneys or following up on your friends’ recommendations for them, make a list of what your ideal post-divorce life looks like. What will it take to get there?

If your divorce will be contentious or complicated, you’re better off having your attorney deal with everything from start to finish.

By far, mediation is the fastest and most inexpensive way to get divorced. This may be an option if  there are no persistent conflicts over alimony, property division, or child custody and support. For difficult cases, a judge may order a separating couple to attempt mediation if they haven’t tried private mediation already.

4. Narrow Your List Down to Three Potential Prospects

Right and wrong choices

Everyone and their mom will have a name for you to call. Sure, call ‘em all! Feel them out. But don’t hire the first lawyer you meet!

Regardless of what you think you know, not all lawyers are the same. Don’t rush into hiring someone just to get it out of the way. Check them out first. Things to consider are:

  • How long has the attorney been in practice?
  • Does he or she specialize in family law?
  • If there are unusual issues in your divorce, is this attorney qualified to handle them?
  • Can you afford this attorney?

5. Interview Your Top-Three Choices

Once you’ve narrowed your list down, schedule consultations with your top three choices. Schedule your initial consultations in person (if possible) and get a feel for how much time they spend talking about the complexities of your case.

Spend an adequate amount of time talking about the specifics in your case, and answer his or her questions honestly. Take a list of your own questions and a notepad and pen to jot down notes. End the visit by letting each one know that you’re considering all your options and you’ll be in touch within a few days.

6. Watch for These Red Flags

Red flag

Watch out for anyone who tries to pressure you into signing with them immediately. You shouldn’t feel like you have to retain anyone without thinking it over.

Generally speaking, good lawyers want you to hire the right person for you. Steer clear of an attorney who makes you feel uncomfortable or suggests tactics that strike you as unethical.

A lawyer who seems distracted or busy with text messages or sending emails might have a full caseload. You don’t want to add to that and end up being last on their list of priorities.

7. Making Your Selection

Accounting / budgeting

Once you have all the info you need and are ready to make a decision, make your choice. In a perfect world, you don’t want cost to be the number one factor you use for deciding. Retain the best attorney you can realistically afford.

Keep in mind that, when it comes to alimony, child support and property division, you may end up paying far more in the long run if your attorney can’t skillfully negotiate a good divorce settlement.

Once you have made your decision, listen carefully to your attorney’s advice, and keep him or her updated on any changes or new information in your situation. With good representation, you will successfully get through your divorce.

In Closing

You can’t anticipate all complications or predict how the process will turn out. All you can do is be sure that you’ve chosen the right attorney to represent you. You want someone who has been at this a while, and can help you get through your divorce as cleanly and quickly as possible.